written by : Giada Combusti
I consider myself to be a spiritual being, and despite the incredulous look I often see on people’s faces when I declare such a thing, just before I met my husband I was trying to figure out how to become a Christian nun. The idea of me living a simple, minimalist life at the service of others and in a constant state of prayer felt to be the best place in this world, however, God had certainly other plans for me. LOL
By saying this I would like to make clear how material possessions didn’t delude me to think that they would help me to live a more meaningful and happier life.
So when my daughter came into our lives, I knew for certain that toys and best gadgets were not the main thing that will thrive her development and happiness.
These are the best gifts we ( as parents ) gave to our daughter and son:
TIME.
Before I became a Mother I thought I didn’t have enough time to do things but only when I had my children I realised how I had time before but not anymore.
Little children need a lot of attention and dedication. I gave my life to them but I can’t stress enough how all those infinite hours spent together helped me to live a richer and fuller experience as not only a parent but as a human being. We can’t quantify this with numbers but with tears in my eyes, I can certainly state that the time I gave them has transformed into the most precious time of our lives.
Can this be considered the best gift I gave to my children? Surely is.
GOOD HEALTHY EATING HABITS.
“ We eat the food that has been cooked, our kitchen is not a restaurant, therefore, there isn’t a menu and we shall be grateful to have 3 main meals every single day.” Ameen.
This is what I often preach when I see my children not too keen on eating what has been cooked for them, so eating what is available is the first lesson I have implanted in their hearts.
My dad is (very) far from being perfect but he has taught me something very important: processed food is bad and sugary things are detrimental to our health. So in our home apart from occasional crisps or instant noodles there isn’t processed food and our added sugar intake is very low. This is what Dr Hu said “The effects of added sugar intake — higher blood pressure, inflammation, weight gain, diabetes, and fatty liver disease — are all linked to an increased risk for heart attack and stroke,” at the Harvard Health Publishing – Harvard Medical School. https://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/the-sweet-danger-of-sugar
Our diet is rich in fibre, vegetables, fruits and pulses. Definitely humble and simple meals!
Could this be considered a gift for life? It was for me and certainly will be for them.
NO TV, NO PHONE, NO TABLETS.
We got rid of our tv as soon as we learned how bad tv was for babies. Here’s an article about it: https://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/Media/Pages/Why-to-Avoid-TV-Before-Age-2.aspx
“ Good evidence suggests that screen viewing before age 18 months has lasting negative effects on children’s language development, reading skills, and short-term memory. It also contributes to problems with sleep and attention.’’ (!!!) Let alone tablets and phones.
We choose to live without it and this has been one of the best decisions we made in our lives. Less distraction more intentional living. However, there are great films out there that I don’t want my kids to miss and so Thursday is our movie night and this is when we are together watching a movie, cartoon or documentary. They love movie night and it is a special moment we share together. The rest of the days in our week we read, play, draw, walk, dance, swim etc
When I search for movies I search for those that would impact us in the most profound way; recently I became aware of how I don’t want to stare at strangers doing stuff I want to see myself doing stuff, making my life my own movie ( DOES THIS MAKE SENSE ?)
I can see adults addicted ( including myself !! ) to phones, tv and tablets, it is extremely difficult to be without them, it is a huge problem we are facing in our society and no one can deny that.
Why on earth do we want our youngest to waste their most important developing years in life watching a screen ??? I don’t get it.
Could a life without screens be a gift? I think so!
ENJOY SIMPLE THINGS
One of our relatives said to me as soon as their kids started to walk she got rid of the pram. That stuck on my mind and as soon as my children knew how to walk I got rid of the pram and I patiently teach them to walk in any circumstances, it has been tough and challenging at first as I had to slow down my paste, picked them up when they fall or encourage them to be strong and focus on going up to steep and slippery surfaces.
Both our kids since a very young age has been great walker. I remember my little girl when she was 16 months walked for HOURS at the Etruscans necropolis which doesn’t have the easiest paths in the world.
A walk in the forest is one of our favourite thing to do.
Could the teaching of loving something simple as a walk in the forest be considered a gift? I believe so.
SWIMMING.
I was blessed enough to witness the first steps, words, smile, laugh etc of both of my children and these things filled up my heart with infinite joy but seeing my little girl ( who is not 6 yet ) freely snorkelling in deep water had helped me to experience something extraordinary joy and a sense of accomplishment I never thought they existed!
Can teaching swimming be considered a skill for life and therefore a gift? Definitely yes!
RIDING A BIKE.
“Good balance enables you and your child to concentrate, sit still and listen when required, to think clearly, to succeed at reading, spelling and mathematics and to develop skills in sporting activities.” said Rosemary MurphyLearning Difficulties expert at: https://developlearning.co.nz/parent-resources/blog/48-the-perfect-balance-why-good-balance-is-key-to-successful-learning/
To our own surprise, both our kids ( 3.5 and 5.5 ) know how to ride a pedal bike, for kilometres. I worked as a fashion model for years and I have been on magazine covers, visited the most luxurious places, eaten the most sophisticated food, travelled to many astonishing cities, met the most interesting and successful people, went to wonderful nature walks etc but seeing my family cycling together has been for sure one of the best things I have ever experienced so far. Not only cycling is good for our health, but it is also a way of living that could potentially keep our children away from silly things that they could encounter in their lives.
Could the ability to ride a bike at a very early age be considered a gift? For sure.
LOVE FOR BOOKS.
I wouldn’t feel as happy, serene, content and grateful as I am if I didn’t have my books.
Books are a source of life; they give me hope, knowledge, truth and a sense of concrete peace. When I walk into a library or a book shop it feels like I am in heaven. I see opportunities, lessons to learn and adventures to discover. Books are good for my mind and essential for my soul.
One of our very first activities has been reading to my kids. Every single day ( unless I am very unwell ) I read at least one story and to today they can’t live without it. If you happen to be at our home you would be seeing at some point of the day both our kids go through their books, by themselves without me suggesting it.
I remember one night my little girl was sick, I had to shower her and change the bedsheets in the middle of the night, as soon as we were ready to go back to bed with a very weak voice and trembling eyes she said: “ Can you read me Mowgli ?”
Do they find comfort with books? Is this a way to escape from boredhood? In both scenarios I see it as a good habit.
Could the transmission of love for books be considered a gift? It is a treasure for me it shall be for them.
Those are definitely our best gift for our children, I hope you enjoyed reading my list 🙂
I hope this article will be helpful to someone.
With Love
Giada